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I MARCH FORTH
I shall now march forth, shield in left hand, sword in right, armor snugly fit by EST tailor in support of our fight against ASTs, Alternate Savings Times. En Garde you dastardly fools. Who invented you, thereby allowing you to disrupt my daily and most comfortable routines? It is said that Benjamin Franklin one day woke up sometime in the 18th century and noted that waking closer to sunrise gave him more hours of daylight to illuminate his home. And so he decreed, or supported, the concept of Daylight Savings Time. DST. The culprit, of course, is not old Benjamin Franklin. The culprit is the watch, or clock, or any time keeping piece. You want to get up at sunrise, well then, get up at sunrise. You don’t need a clock, or a watch, or even a rooster. All you need is that golden sphere known as the sun. As long as the sun rises and sets, you can get up and go to sleep at sunrise and at sunset, or, even more quaintly, when you awake at whatever time of day it is. After all, prior to Peter Henlein, the inventor of watches some time around 1504 in Nuremberg, Germany, we all got up when the rooster crowed, and before that when the woolly-mammoth lifted his trunk and tooted to one one all that it was time to wake up, gather your spears, and go on the hunt. Come come my dear neanderthal brethren. Let us see what kind of guts you got in you. And that worked. Except for one little old thing, which, as it happens, constitutes my Pet Peeve for the week. It goes something like this. It matters not a whit or a farthing or even a dollar what wondrous gifts we are given in this life, whether it is the gift of breath, or of lethal weaponry, or of motorized vehicles, or temperature taking devices, or language, or dictionaries to interpret the language we have invented, no matter what those wondrous gifts were or have been given, no matter how perfect they are or were, we will always, always try to improve upon them. If they’re good, we will endeavor to make them even better. This will not necessarily improve on the product so much as it will improve our delusional mindset that states nothing is ever as good as it will be after we have improved upon it. Don’t believe me? An example if you do not mind. Which is better? The watch, or sunrise itself? Which mechanism tells us what the other mechanism is doing when all the while we can see what it is doing on our own. Pray do tell us that why don’t you old chap?
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